Dealing with Grief?

I have for a month now, mourned the death of my mother. I am an adult, and I have been letting myself, try to take my time getting past the worst of the grief. I however, am dreaming nightly, peaceful dreams, if and when I can sleep.

I have taken down the wreath, I have put away the dried flowers, I have attened church, eaten comfort foods, cried until I thought the blue was going to wash out of my eyes and run down my cheeks.

I am reminded of her every where. I am not usually a sad person, but, I frankly do not know how to get out of this mood.

I have comfort in knowing she is safe, that she is with a higher power, that the dementia and lung problems are no longer painful for her.

What is the issue?

Dealing with Grief?
i am so sorry to hear that you lost your mother. of course this is going to be painful for you, and you have every right to grive and mourn. this is normal when you lose someone. i highly recommend taking it one day at a time and spending time with the people you love. try to see some friends and let them know how you feel, because it's always good to reach out to someone outside of the family who isn't being affected by the same thing that you are. surround yourself with people who will make you feel good about yourself and tell you they love you. spend more time outdoors, nature always heals. and do activities that you enjoy.your grieving is your body's way of letting everyone know just how much you loved this person.

you might have depression. sometimes it is difficult to tell the difference between grief and clinical depression, although that is what can happen when healthy grief becomes unhealthy. it's not uncommon. you should check that out, to make this difficult time a bit easier on you.

but don't be afraid. it's going to be alright. i send my condolences from the bottom of my heart, and i dearly hope that love and time heal you soon. you'll get through this, stay strong!

XOXOXO good luck =]
Reply:It is very good to talk to a professional about your grief. There is a new website with a messageboard you may find helpfull also. It always makes me feel better just talking about it http://deathsupport.com Report It
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Reply:You miss her. You miss talking to her. You miss being able to see her and call her. That is why you are grieving. When my father passed, I think it took me about a year before I stopped crying every day. I was 22 years old when he died. But 17 years later, I still miss him, but in a different way. It's a slow process of getting over that kind of unbearable grief. I personally did a lot of praying to help get over the grief. But that's me.



Another friend of mine lost her mom one year ago, and is wondering how to deal with the anniversary of her mother's death. And this is a year later for her. So it's all very normal. Just know however you handle it or behave, is how you need to be. Don't be hard on yourself for any of your feelings or reactions you are having. It's all normal. You could try a grief support group. I know my friend did that for her mother. And that has helped her a lot. Good luck. I'm very sorry you're going through this.



My friend has also started journaling her feelings, which has helped her a lot.
Reply:Peace



"There is some things in life that don't go the way you want them to or the way you think they should, but you can't dwell on these because you'll miss out on other opportunities. Don’t think you will forget her and no longer remember her… Tears will come to you every other day or Month, you will cry because you love her, you will cry because you are mad she is no longer there, you will cry because you will see her smile in someone ales, there are so many things that will bring tears to your eyes.

Your mom will always be with you.



"Remember me when you are gone, far to the beyond, away from me. A journey I cannot go with you on, even though you are going for good. I have tried for tears not to fall from my eyes. Keep alive the beautiful times we share, and take it to heart that my love for you is ever sure. Remember me. Oh, remember me, for memory may fade but they never die."
Reply:This is normal you loved her .. you are still grieving everyone needs a certain lenght of time to get over it and come to terms with it.. don't rush yourself and if you feel like crying let it all out.. My best friend lost her mom last year in May and she is not really over it.. she needs to go the cemetery every day.. she talks to her there and like you she knows her mom was very ill and she is now in a better place where there is no more pain...and that the soul lives on...You will get better don't force it...distract yourself and go out.. meet friends.. stay busy but don't suppress your feelings...Mourning is natural.. with time it will still be hard at special days Christmas her Birthday but other than that after the first year it will become easier for you... look for diversion in the meantime and look for comfort by talking about it with a good friend...xxxx

Good Luck xx
Reply:The issue is love. You loved her dearly and you miss her still. There is no time limit on the amount of time you can mourn someone. It takes as long as it takes. When my dad died it was horrible but with each passing day things slowly got better. One day you'll find yourself smiling about something she said or did. The next day you may laugh about something. Slowly the pain will diminish and happy thoughts of her will take the place of the sadness. They'll always be times when you are sad about losing her, that's normal too but I promise.. it will get easier. Just let it take it's natural course. Cry until you can't anymore and then find a special place for those feelings and bring them out when you just can't find anything to be happy about that day.. and you'll find.. that when you thought there was nothing to be happy about.. a bit of her love has just made you smile again. Take care and my thoughts are with you.