As The Petal Falls (poems)?

One of my few poems. Please review







I held a flower in my hand,



gently picking at it’s petals.



It hurt no more, the pain is gone



I felt the solid earth beneath my skin.



Gently rocking me to sleep



My heart in a constant rhythm, ever slowing.



The deep red water, drying around me,



The flower began to dye,



A single petal fell from its stem.



As the petal fell i saw my life,



my triumphs, and my let downs



my good moments, and all of my bad,



As the petal fell I felt my heart stop,



i strained my lungs, but they would take no more.



My hand felt cold as it too went limp.



Finally the petal hit the floor;



I closed my eyes resting... forevermore

As The Petal Falls (poems)?
Just because a poem is sad, doesn't mean one is contemplating suicide....



I think its very well written with passion. One small critique, you change tenses sometimes, like I held a Flower, and then is gone. It should be WAS gone. But that's minor. I really like it overall.
Reply:A true poet would know that it is not up to others to judge their stream of consciousness. When one expresses themselves, it is no ones place, nor their authority to judge. For if they were to judge your work, they are simply judging your mind, and to say its good or bad is simply immoral. I also believe that it is up to the reader to decide and feel the theme of ones work. This allows freedom on ones mind to roam freely in the world you have created for them. Good luck on your works.

(please rate)
Reply:I liked it except for one phrase. Maybe consider replacing "my let downs" with "my failures" or something different. Read it aloud substituting that and see if you don't think it flows and sounds better. JMO
Reply:Is this a suicide contemplation poem? that was my take on it.
Reply:I think it's pretty good.

I like it.

Nice work:)

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